Why Not? 'Cause There's No Money

So I had a mediation. We got to the part of the agreement where we were all discussing extra curricular activities. Mom wanted the kids in activities, dad wants limits. Mom, surprisingly makes more money than dad each month and also receives decent child support. Then comes the issue of school fees for this elective and that elective. Now, as a parent, I want the best for my kids. I also know that the best is not FREE. The best costs money and as a lot of people know…..money is not growing on trees in the money forest any longer. The forest is actually no longer there for that matter. It was bulldozed down by the banks and the government and turned into an office building where lines form every day so that Americans can now collect unemployment benefits just to put food on the table. Ok, enough of my political ranting, back to the story. 

So dad is tapped out and mom says she's tapped out, BUT she still wants for the children. Dad says that he would like to help and it's not a matter of NO I WON'T, but NO I CAN'T. There is a HUGE difference between the two. 

I love my two kids and want to provide everything that they ask for, but at times I have to say no. If not, they would participate in every activity, they would then spend every waking hour in school, then the activity and then aftercare or with a babysitter just so I could work even longer hours to pay for all the activities. In the long run, I would have no time to spend with my children. I would have no time to build a relationship with my children and my children would have it all, but have nothing at the same time. Now, for some this may be a reality and maybe a bit extreme. For others the reality is this. Pay for a few activities. Work a few more hours to try to cover those activities and then wonder where you will get the extra money for food, gas, car payment or rent. You love your children but as adults and parents we have to make difficult decisions. As my 13 yr old told me only a few weeks ago, "You know dad, difficult decisions are not always easy to make". How profound from a 13 yr old, but he gets it. 

Love your kids. That's free and costs time, not money. Spend time with your kids. That too is free and again costs only time, not money. Do what you can, but in the end if a child, and yes they are children, asks why not, the most simple answer maybe…….'cause there's no money. I'm sorry.

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